For some reason many men believe that they must shower their girl with constant love and attention in order to keep her interest. I can only assume that guys get this from movies and TV, or perhaps they get this idea from friends and family encouraging them to “show her how much you care”. Men then go overboard trying to prove themselves by laying on the romance extra thick. They send her flowers, take her out on extravagant dates, over-complimenting her and constantly reassuring her of his love for her. They never give women space. While there’s nothing wrong with doing these things once in a while, and very sparingly, it should ONLY be done with a committed girlfriend or wife; not some girl that you just started dating.
Over doing it and smothering her with your love and attention doesn’t bring her any closer, it actually pushes her away. It’s important to give women space.
You Must Give Women Space
It’s true that women DO WANT your love, attention and reassurance when they’re in love with you and have a high level of attraction for you. However, women also NEED a little mystery in order to continue to be in love and attracted to you. Women want to wonder about you when you’re not around, wonder what you’re doing, wonder where you are or who you’re with.
You may remember when you were younger and little girls plucking the petals off flowers, “he loves me, he loves me not”. It’s scientific fact that women are more attracted to men whose feelings are unclear. It’s that little bit of mystery about you that causes her to think about you and feel all those emotions. It makes her feel alive. She wants to anticipate your call, your upcoming date, what you’re going to say next. She wants to wonder what you’re up to, who you are with and if you’re thinking about her the same way she’s thinking about you.
Attraction Grows In Space
French composer Claude Debussy once said, “Music is the space between the notes.” It’s really very similar with love and attraction. It’s when you two aren’t together where her love and attraction is growing into something beautiful. However, when you’re always contacting her, always available to her, over-complimenting her, or reassuring her; you’re smothering her. There’s no space for that to happen. There’s nothing to wonder about, nor any mystery about you. So, you must give women space. You must give her space even if she wants to see or talk to you all the time. Scarcity creates value and desire.
It’s better that she be a little frustrated that she’s not seeing you as much as she wants, as opposed to getting all of you, all the time. Plus, that frustration partly fuels the sexual tension, increasing her attraction for you even more. But with tension, there needs to be release if you want to maintain her love and attraction. This is why you must give women space and let them come to you. She will do it at her own pace, and you must allow that.
How Much Is Enough Space?
When women miss you and want your attention and presence, they will put themselves into your orbit. They’re not going to make it too obvious, though. Sometimes they do make it obvious, but it’s usually very subtle.
Part of feminine energy is uncertainty. So, most women won’t put themselves in an awkward position when they’re unclear about your feelings. So, they may contact you to tell you they were thinking about you, or something similar, hoping that you’ll take the lead and do something about it. And what do you do then? Tell her that you want to see her and ask her when she’s free. When on your date, just focus on having fun with her and gently leading things into the bedroom. It’s really that simple. You don’t have to over-complicate things by always chasing her.
Giving Structured Women Space
Now, sometimes girls have this set of rules where they can’t reach out to you. In that case, just reach out to her no more than once a week and arrange a date with her. If she’s really into you, she’s eventually going to get frustrated and more than likely put herself into your orbit. So, don’t sweat it. Just take it slow, build up that anticipation and tension with her. She won’t be able to get enough of you.
I Can Help You
Do you feel that your girl is needing some space and need some help turning the situation around? Perhaps you are having some other issues with your dating and/or relationships? I can help you. Please visit my coaching page and book private, one-on-one coaching with me. We will get to the bottom of this and get things turned around for you.
Be sure to also check out my recommended reading for further learning about game, women, dating and relationships.
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