I was inspired to write this blog post about the dangers of double texting after a client I’ve been coaching went against what I recommended he do. This is more of a cautionary example of why it’s important to let her come to you and not try to force things. If your girl pulls away or ends things, you want it to be HER idea to start things up again. Otherwise you’re basically trying to take the boat upstream without a paddle.
This girl pulled away from him because things were moving too fast. I recommended that he completely back off and let her come to him. He did well for a while, but his anxiety got the best of him and he broke no contact. It ended up working for him at first. She was responsive and she even began texting him again. However, she did reiterate that things were moving too fast for her before she pulled away.
My client jumped right back into where he left off before she pulled away. Instead of letting her come to him at her own pace, he began pursuing her again and it backfired. He wanted to meet up with her, so he sent her a text. She didn’t get back to him. After a few hours later he sent another text. Then another text stating he didn’t like being ignored. She finally responded much later, explaining that she was with her family in an area with lousy reception and eventually a dead battery. She then told him that she wasn’t ignoring him, but she will now be ignoring him. That just goes to show that sometimes women are just busy, and double texting or triple texting just communicated his neediness.
Double Texting Hurts Attraction
I’m not putting anyone down, or attacking them or making fun of them. I’ve made all these same mistakes and this is how you learn. But, after the courtship has been initiated, you must let women come to you. I can’t stress this enough. When they do, you take the lead and do something about it. But it must be her idea. Otherwise you’re just chasing her, which communicates low value.
In a situation, such as this, when you text a woman, or call her, or send her an email, or whatever; do not make an attempt to contact her again until you have heard back from her. This is essentially what is meant by “double texting”. I encourage you to read my articles, “The Importance Of Giving Women Space” and “Your Patience With Women Will Pay-Off” to understand further.
The main reason why double texting, or continually initiating contact hurts her attraction for you is, because it communicates neediness, whether you’re needy or not. It’s subtle, but women still sense this and, if you continue with this behavior, it ruins attraction. You’re trying to force things, which begins to make her feel unsafe. It also gives off a relationship vibe, and that communicates feminine energy. If your girl is a feminine woman, as most women are, this will assist in killing the masculine-feminine polarization, ultimately turning her off.
Let Women Come To You
I can’t state this enough; you must let women come to you. Be direct with your intentions, then let her make the choice. If she cares about you, loves you and/or values you, you WILL hear from her in the near future. By you being strong and patient, it will only increase the sexual tension and her attraction for you. If she doesn’t care or value you, you won’t hear from her again. You really win either way. If she comes back with her attraction and desire even stronger than before–win. If she moves on, saving you a bunch of time, energy and frustration–win.
This is yet another reason why you should always be more focused on yourself, your goals and your life’s purpose rather than a relationship with her. Chase excellence, not women. You won’t be worrying about what she’s doing, or how she feels about you, nearly as much. THAT is masculine! And masculinity drives the ladies wild, just as does her femininity drives YOU wild.
I Can Help You
Having trouble double texting or getting your girl to respond to you? Perhaps you are having some other issues with your dating and/or relationships? I can help you. Please visit my coaching page and book private, one-on-one coaching with me. We will get to the bottom of this and get things turned around for you.
Be sure to also check out my recommended reading for further learning about game, women, dating and relationships.
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